Tuesday, January 27, 2009

COC'S

Despite kinda sorta studying it for three years, I have only half a clue as to what Graphic Designers (Caps) actually do. A great many of my friends Design Graphically every day for a job and get paid right handsome to do so. Vaughan Oliver up there was a childhood hero of mine, but these days I cant figure out what he actually did when he made those album covers, was it all him from idea to execution or did he get a wee Japanese boyo to take the photographs of a bunch of weird stuff he thought of whilst having a shower and then cough a load of type on top of it?
I've sort of concluded that they (Graphic Designers) rush into work in the morning with box of Muesli in one hand and a copy of Creative Review that isn't in the shops yet in the other, complain about the Tube (take the bus you mug) then settle down to some brainstorming (checking their FB), later on they have some blue sky thinking (looking out the window) whilst listening to Sigur Ros (that's not a dig btw), after chewing the arms of their square rimmed bi-focals they have a big meeting with the Partners (the ones that swapped the cocaine for claret early on) where they eat Farley's Rusk's and drink coco. They all slap each others backs and finally decide on a design that's based on a visual pun (or a joke to you and me) that anyone who isn't regularly smoking strong Cannabis (70% of England) will grasp after seeing three times in the advert breaks during Midsomer's Murders. Then its over to the photographers, illustrators and art workers to dress their joke up in a visual context and make it walk across the page, all nice and tidy.
Then again I could have driven my problem with understanding what they actually do into blind dislike and a ferocious jealousy of their salary. They could very well be like little Bob Gill's and single handily steer our notions of how we feel about what we eat, what we read, what we sit on and all the stupid shit that we want to waste out cash on. Hmmmm maybe I should bring it up at the weekend....

6 comments:

.aidan said...

they design graphics

deklin said...

wouldn't you like to get paid to do that though? i would

.aidan said...

you get paid to write words

KICKIT said...

brilliant musings as usual robert.

tugboat said...

"later on they have some blue sky thinking (looking out the window)"

hahaha

i was at a graphic designer's office the last day (totally state of the art - steel doors reclaimed from a factory; £200 water jug; the curtains matched the little stringy thing in the middle of the diary; that kinda thing) and i was fully prepared for the guy to be a total douchebag but he was really sound!

robvanhalen said...

This sort of thing is true, loads of the head honcho's at my place would have a beer with me quicker than some guy's in my department, the big boys aint that bad.